I sat one day and truly thought to myself, what is self-care? I would see this in many of my social media friend's status or descriptions underneath their photos. Outside of the literal wording, I truly did not have a concept of what self-care is. You see, from birth you get a few moments of nourishment from your parents, then you're thrown into this never ending cycle of "you've got to learn/do this for survival." At no point do we get the opportunity to enjoy life without having to consider what bill is due next, how many vacation days do I have, or who is asking something of me that I don't really want to do?

A close friend and I often have talks about life and how Americans live to work and don't work to live. This implies that everyday, we get up to go to jobs just for a means of survival. I many times see the "I don't want to adult today" posts or the "Take me back to when I was a child" posts. All of these are indicative of the fact that we rarely have time for ourselves to decompress and enjoy the simplest aspects of life.

I ran across an article this past June that gave some statistics about the health of African American men. The article pretty much confirmed information that I already knew based upon previous studies that I have read. Nonetheless, black men were noted to have the worse health when being compared to any other racial group in the United States. I continued to read and discovered the following: black men live 7.1 years less that other racial groups, have higher death rates than women for all leading causes of death, disproportionately experience higher death rates in all the leading causes of death, and much more. You can find more information on this at https://www.verywellhealth.com/black-american-mens-health-2328772.

I then thought to myself on how I have several friends in many different careers, but I don't know what they do to take care of themselves outside of what they give everyone else. No one ever told me how to keep a work-life balance. With that, I interviewed several of my buddies, who are black men, about this topic. I gave them the Oxford Dictionary definition of self-care and asked each of them the same questions as it related to their careers and self-care. I said for the next three weeks, I will present this information as I am sure it will help another black man or man in general with mechanisms to truly help preserve himself. Check out their responses below!

Name: Glen

What field are you in?

Area Operations Manager in a private hospitality firm.

How many hours do you work a week?

8 hour work days, and addition to being on-call some weekends.

Stress Level: High stress and high demand career.

Workload includes:

Overseas all company properties within the greater Atlanta area.

Outside of your career, are there any other roles that you fulfill?

I am a life and career guidance mentor to my employees and other younger males.

How would you define self-care?

Self-care is actually having a peace of mind in life with certain aspects of various relationships, financial stability and mental stability.

How do you implement self-care in your life? I implement it by not being a follower and leading by example. I say no and accept not being apart of the "in-crowd." I don't go out every Friday or keep up with a social media appearance. I am physically active in working out and staying committed to my physical health. I allow time for myself to relax my mind in a stress-free environment e.g. home or church.

How did you know that you needed an outlet?

I realized that I was not enjoying life and had so much more that I wanted in life. I needed to pull back, regroup, and pray to God for guidance.

Name: Ryan

What field are you in?

Critical Care Nursing.

How many hours a week do you work?

36-48 hours per week.

Stress Level: High stress and high demand.

Workload includes:

Managing critically ill patients two at a time.

Outside of your career, are there any other roles that you fulfill?

I am a mentor to black male nursing students. This requires me to act in a role of a peer counselor ensuring that they recognize that there is a finish line. Many black men come into the field of nursing with several strikes against them. The last barrier that one of them would need is to not feel confident and competent in their abilities to provide exceptional care to patient.

How would you define self-care?

Self-care for me is taking the time to take care of myself and relieve stress through various activities.

How do you implement self-care in your life?

I implement it through dancing, working out, music, and anything that can center me and provide me with peace.

How did you recognize that you needed an outlet?

I recognized it because the level of enthusiasm that I had for nursing declined over time. I no longer could empathize with the patients, their families and even my own family. I just felt like I had nothing more to give. Just as you said, I was living to work and not working to live. I was so focused on the financial gain and picked up additional hours. Overtime, I could not enjoy the money. I now have the work-life balance.

Name: KJ

What field are you in?

Information Technology.

How many hours do you work a week?

40 plus.

Stress Level: High stress and high demand.

Workload includes:

Overseeing all technology components for a transportation agency.

Outside of your career, are there any other roles that you fulfill?

Besides work I volunteer in the community as a mentor, HIV counselor and tester, and I hold several positions on multiple boards.

How would you define self-care?

Doing something that will better yourself overall.

How do you implement self-care in your life? I implement self-care by being alone. In my alone times I am online looking at different home-improvement projects. Being a home owner is a lot of work believe it or not. Opposed to me spending so much money on contractors, I search the net to see what I can do for my self.This has become my outlet and main stress relief as I can easily free my mind of tiresome workdays. I also spend a lot of my free time volunteering/mentoring for city and community based organizations.

How did you recognize that you needed an outlet?

Several things happened. What really did it for me was broken friendships. I was really focused on pleasing my friends and ensuring that they had comfort within their lives. After I no longer engaged with them at this level, I had a lot of time to realize of how I was depriving myself due to me giving so much to everyone else.

Name: LaPoetry

What field are you in?

Legal

How many hours a week do you work?

40 plus

What is the stress level of your career?

High stress

What does your workload include?

Work with law offices in several states.

Outside of your career, are there any other roles that you fulfill?

I am a musician, full-time student, and a mentor to young adults within my community.

How would you define self-care?

Self-care encompasses healthy living concepts such as sleep, diet, exercise, and meditation that can help generate the overall well being of a person’s mind, body and soul.

How do you implement self-care in your life?

Music is one of the ways that I implement self-care. It calms and soothes my body and mind. Playing basketball is a physical activity that allows me to decompress as well.

How did you recognize that you needed an outlet?

I realized that I needed to take a break when most of my "free time" was spent sleeping. I gave so much to everyone else that I when I had alone time, I spent it sleeping life away.